THE COMMUNE

Jana

A cousin, a maid of honor, a crucial member of the throuple, and, of course, a best friend.

Dear Mariah,

I’ve been thinking lately about how truly lucky I am to have you in my life—not just as my cousin, but as my best friend. And I just wanted to take a moment to tell you how much you mean to me.

From traumatic childhood memories we unfortunately weirdly share to grown-up talks, you’ve been by my side through it all. You’ve seen me at my best and thankfully not at my worst, but yet your love and support have never wavered. There’s a certain kind of comfort in knowing that no matter what life throws at me, you’re always there—with open arms, a listening ear, and words of wisdom that somehow always make everything better.

Thank you for always being there for me, and encouraging me to be and do better. Your encouragement has lifted me more times than I can count. Your loyalty, kindness, and the way you show up for me—consistently and wholeheartedly—mean more to me than words can express.

You are not only family by blood but family by choice. I trust you with my heart and my soul, and I am endlessly grateful for the bond we share. It’s rare to find someone who just gets you, and I’m so blessed that I’ve found that in you.

No matter where life takes us, I know this connection will remain unshakable. Thank you for being my safe space, my cheerleader, and the person who knows my heart like no one else does.

I love you so much. Always and forever.

Jana

And of course, couldn’t possibly communicate with Mariah without a voice note

CAROLINE

“Your Tall Friend”

Mariah (lil D, enforcer of games),

Happy 30th birthday my sweet and beautiful friend!! I am infinitely glad that we met at VSC so many years ago, and am so thankful my short stint there gave me you. Your friendship means the world to me, and you’ve shown me what it means to show up for others consistently, even if it’s just via voice note. I am always hoping to be as good as you - whether it’s at work, at home, in relationships, the list goes on. Thank you for being the light in every room and the spice in all my spicy margs!! I hope your 30th birthday is amazing, and that the year ahead is even better. You deserve it 🤍

Love forever,
Caroline

PS - it’s just confidence, baby!!!

And finally, a message from your parents…

(and some feedback from Nubbo)

Uzoma

A story, by Nia

It’s late 2018 and we’re both in the midst of new and curious and complicated feelings. I, in a web of messy situationships and impending heartbreak. You, stumbling into what feels like fate. We meet up after work, find a cozy corner of Souvla, unpack our bags of books and journals and the magic begins. We trade poem for poem, laugh at wild shit men have said to us, and get closer in a way that our high school selves may have never seen coming. 

At this point we’ve known each other for eight years. (Facebook confirmed we became friends in 2010.) Together we weathered the drama of high school popularity, and trends, and fitting in without reallyy having to talk about race. Going to Black grad senior year might have been the closest we got to acknowledging our bond as the only two Black girls in our clique of friends. Chalk it up to the Redwood City/San Carlos suburbs, but we certainly made up for it in the years to come. 

Returning back to our early-20s, this time of our lives was such a special new chapter of us. Writing and poetry really got us through some shit. And set the foundation for the ever-growing and evolving friendship we have today. We reflected on our experiences growing up, the complexities of our mixed Black identities, and the new paths we were charting for ourselves. Looking back, our texts are full of fragments of unfinished thoughts, drafts of new poems, and advice on how to deal with fuckboy-ery. We were young, independent, and free. From writing dates and sleepovers to plotting our future travel to Kenya, we really were those two Taruses ready to take on the world. 

Enter the men who would upend our understanding of love and relationships, forever. I remember how Drew’s name would start to casually come up in conversation. How the two of you would “catch up” from across time zones, how he had this really sweet and thoughtful habit of writing long-ass paragraphs and asking lots of questions each time you spoke. (see below)

If your destiny together wasn’t already sealed from the long-distance letter writing, it was written in the stars. We love a healthy Taurus-Virgo duo. 

All jokes inside, it has truly been such an incredible journey to witness your and Drew’s relationship grow over the years. From the iconic “hanging with you chica” text to the “will you marry me” ask, the two of you have charted an expansive path together. One of patience, curiosity, and exploration. Your relationship embodies what it means to be at home in yourself and with each other. I admire how you challenge each other, how you complement one another, and how you seek shared growth and understanding. 

You and Drew were some of the first friends I introduced Uzoma to. You opened up your LA house to us, and welcomed us with a warm, cozy meal and a night of deep talks and laughter. Any nerves I had about introducing Uzoma to my friends dissipated with the natural way he was welcomed into our friendship, as if he had been there all along. You have a way of making a home and sharing a home in such a beautiful way. Thank you for inviting us in.

This past year has held so many milestones for our shared friendship. Taking The Commune on the road to Nigeria was an adventure of a lifetime. To this day I am still in awe with the way you and Drew immediately said you were on board for coming to our Nigerian wedding. The clarity and certainty in the way you two showed up for us is something I cherish. You may have arrived in Nigeria as our friends, but you left being quite literally our adopted siblings. 

I’m so happy that the two of you were able to not only be there for our big celebration (and to witness Uzoma’s first cry), but also that you were able to travel to Kenya and visit your familyland. I know how special it was for Brad that you were able to visit the place he had been to so many years before. To retrace his footsteps, and then come home to share your stories and pictures with him. 

Just as he made his presence known at our wedding, flying around us as we said our forever vows, I know Brad will always be here in your early morning sunrise, showing off as one does when you’re Black Picasso. (I’ll spare us your acronym.) Mariah, you carry his spirit, his laughter, his care and commitment to showing up. Showing up for your people. Thank you for letting me be one of your people. 

I love you dear friend, happy birthday Mariah! Let’s take on our 30s like the badass Tauruses we are.

Xoxo
Ni